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Woken up at 1am on the 20th by lyra who wanted her toy moved, and for the frog in her bed to get out (?!). She grizzled till 2am. Mr Anita was awake as a result so we chatted briefly before I went back to sleep, only to be woken up about 3am by a painful cramp.
I thought it felt a bit stronger than the other ones I’d had recently so decided to get up and time them to see what was happening. They were about every 8 mins or so, but I had to get up and walk around with them, and they lasted a good 1.5 to 2 mins a time.
After about an hour – I woke Mr Anita up and said I thought this was it. We rang the Rosie and told them we’d be in when we could get childcare. Rang the MIL and she came over – but took a good hour as it was icy. By the time she got here I was impatient to get going, but for some reason it took a good hour or so before we were on our way.
Hated the car journey – had lined up the tens by then but it didn’t seem to be working properly – was frantically trying to read the instructions by streetlight as we whizzed past! When we got to the hospital – it’s a long walk round from the car park now – great planning on someone’s part, and I had two contractions in very quick succession. A kindly porter who was just coming on duty came over with a wheelchair and took us over to the maternity bit.
Got booked in – and was having contractions about every five minutes by then. They were about to change shifts so we waited till ‘our’ midwife came on duty till they examined me. I was bouncing on a ball by then and had hit the gas and air . I was 4 cm at 7am, and was relieved it wasn’t a false alarm. Our midwife was called Lena and was from the Lebanon, and had a trainee with her who was called Magda – Polish, and they’d actually trained together so were good friends.
Labour trotted on, tried various different positions, it got to about 11am, and I was surprised not to have a baby yet – as I’d had lyra much quicker! After reading my birth plan, Lena suggested I tried the pool, and I thought that sounded like a good idea. It was very quiet in the hospital that day so we pretty much had the run of the place.
The pool was nice and peaceful but my contractions slowed down again. Mr Anita said afterwards I was beginning to look really desperate and tired – I think the lack of sleep and few false alarms had really got to me. I decided I’d rather have a more painful but quicker labour so got out again.
Despite my determination not to end up lying on my back, I was tired and fed up – so decided that was what I was going to do next. I asked to be examined as I wanted to know how dilated I was, and it was 7cm. Lena said to let her know when I got the urge to push as it can happen quickly with second time mums, but I wasn’t really feeling anything like that at that point.
They were getting the baby’s heart-rate by using a sonic-aid so no continuous monitoring this time, which made a change. Mr Anita said he found it more intrusive in a way as they were trying to get it every 15 mins and that meant we weren’t left alone to get on with it as much as we had been with lyra’s birth.
Just as Lena went out for her tea break – I heard myself making that weird bellowing noise that meant ‘urge to push’ last time! Mr Anita got her back in very quickly and she got the medical student in too – who I’d agreed could watch the birth.
After a few minutes of pushing contractions my waters burst all over the room – it was like an explosion – I actually wet the chair over the other side! There was meconium in the waters, so I think that was when the room started filling up a bit with a doctor and a paediatric doctor, and Magda came back off her break too.
I hated the pushing – again – and was writhing around on the bed, trying to shut my legs, which wasn’t going down well with anyone. The heart-rate suddenly dropped too, and they were muttering about doing something. I was shouting ‘get this f*cking baby out NOW!’ and other very polite statements, feeling very panicky, very unlike I was able to do it myself.
They took my gas and air off me to make me push better – although Mr Anita thinks it was because I was being rude! Lena was doing a really good job of coaching me through it – but I wasn’t really taking any notice. After a really intense pain, they asked if I wanted to feel the head, but I didn’t, and a minute later Kyle Peter James was born, and delivered up onto my tummy. He was a dark purple colour and after they cut the cord, got checked over and was 9, and then 10 on the apgar scores.
Mr Anita said ‘it’s a boy!’ and I didn’t believe him. The medical student agreed, but I refused to take his word for it either as he was a boy too, and might be biased…. Think the gas and air had affected me a bit!
The official labour time was 5 hours and the pushing time was about 8 minutes apparently, although that bit felt a lot longer!
I’d torn quite a bit and needed stitches, which they did while Mr Anita went to call everyone. Kyle latched on in the delivery room which was fabulous, (although he then went on to refuse to latch on later – just like his big sister).
Mr Anita went off pretty quickly to get his mum and lyra to come and see the baby, while I had a bath and got myself looking less like a shark attack. Lyra looked both so big and so small when she came in. She knew straight away where the tummy baby had gone and said hello to him. Down on the ward, she told a midwife off for talking too loudly as ‘baby’s sleeping’ ! She liked the present kyle had brought with him too so that helped I think.
Overall – now I look back on it – I think it was a pretty good birth experience, really helped by a truly considerate pair of midwives who were determined to get things going as naturally as possible. However I found it a lot more ‘violent’ than lyra’s birth, having to do the pushing bit myself, and feeling shocked by feeling so out of control.
My main thoughts are that I’m delighted with kyle – who is a lovely baby (as his sister was too!) and really really pleased that I never have to go through birth again!